Last night, after the mall closed for the evening, I waited on a bench for Taco to get out of work. This is a regular occurrence since he usually gets out an hour after I do. Usually, I'll sit and read a book while the other mall employees give me a friendly "goodbye" wave and head home. Last night, however, I was on the phone with Amberley as she kept me company until Taco was ready to leave. While I'm chatting away and laughing on the phone, a man decided to sit on my bench. I don't typically care when someone wants to share a bench, it happens, but it was closing time and there were clearly other EMPTY benches in the area to sit on. At first, I thought, well, maybe he is waiting for someone in the hair salon (that was directly in front of my bench) since they stay open later if they still have customers. As the last employee walked out of the salon and closed the doors, the man did not move. Starting to get nervous, I moved my bags to the other side of me and tried to text Amberley, while talking to her on the phone, that a strange man was sitting next to me.
It was at that moment that I noticed that the man was slowly moving closer to me and glancing over at my texts. I quickly pretended to text something else and hoped that someone would walk by so I could get up and walk to another bench. I know what you're thinking, "why not just get up and leave?" Nope. I could not allow myself to turn my back on this stranger who was much bigger than I and whom I had no idea was capable of doing. No one was around. Minutes flew by as I started looking towards Taco's store to see if there was any sign of him leaving soon. The man was now slouching over his lap and fiddling with a small bag which I took as a chance to text Amberley about him. Then it happened, he started to talk to me. He asked where a good place to eat was and that he was from Houston and didn't know the area. I politely recommended a few places hoping that would be the moment he'd get up and leave. Nope. He continued to sit there, slowly getting closer and closer next to me as I tried to make even more conversation with Amberley.
Let me tell you about the benches at the mall, I am 5'5 and I can lay flat on the bench comfortably. There is absolutely no reason for a stranger to sit that close to you on that long of a bench if it is just the two of you. Not knowing what else to do, I casually bought up (to Amberley) the gift that I received from Ken for my birthday last year; a pocket knife. I very obviously let it be known that I carry a knife with me. I don't know if that made him nervous, but he proceeded to interrupt my conversation again and asked me to watch his small bag for him while he walked away to get candy. Because I am so damn polite, I agreed and took the opportunity to tell Amberley exactly what was happening. Not even a minute later, he was back (empty handed) and sitting close to me barely touching my leg with his knee. Then he started talking AGAIN. He mentioned that he was a kick boxer and waiting for his brother to get off work. He even asked me if he looked "lean" and "fit" to which I replied "I wouldn't know." I mentioned numerous times that I had a boyfriend whom I was also waiting to get off of work. This did not stop him though as he continued to interrupt my phone call.
It was a few minutes past 10 now, he had been sitting next to me for a whole hour. I mentioned what seems like the 100th time, to Amberley, that Taco would be out at any minute. I looked up at the store and saw the lights go off. Relief swept through my body knowing that Taco was finally closing the store and coming for me. I relayed to Amberley that Taco was closing up shop. That is when the man decided it was time for him to go. He stood up, said "I'm going to leave now. Nice to meet you," shook my hand, and walked towards the store where his "brother" was "working." Seeing Taco and his employees walking towards me was the best thing ever. I gathered my things as we all headed to the exit and I told him what had happened for the last hour.
There are a million and one things that I could've done to get out of that situation but just the thought of that one guy possibly attacking me in an empty mall just feet away from where my boyfriend works was enough to put me at a standstill. Don't get me wrong, I am very capable of being the rudest mother f*cker on the planet if I have to. I am capable of becoming violent to protect myself or another person. The only issue with that is, if there is no one around, and I am trying to be these things towards a 6 foot guy with the body of a kick boxer, who do you think is going to win?
Normally I don't share these things because I never felt the need to. Things like this happen to women every single day. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. Honestly, I get hit on at least once or twice when I am at work. It is highly unwanted but you roll your eyes and get used to it. Now, I was raised not to live in fear, and I always applied that to snakes, the cucuy, and I try to apply that to clowns. However, I think, if you don't live in fear of, for example, a strange man with a strange body language, you let your guard down. I don't want that.
I understand completely that this man could've just honestly been waiting for his brother and making polite conversation. I understand and have been told numerous times that I have an "approachable" face. BUT, you don't know who he is. You don't know what he is capable of doing. And neither did I and I would much rather act in a way that is going to keep me safe rather in a way that is going to make me sorry that I let my guard down.
- Lis
Disclaimer: I am in no way, shape, or form implying that all men are the same because God knows that for SOME reason, SOMEONE is going to magically get offended by this.
P.S. Thank you, Amberley, for staying on the phone with me the entire time. You the real M.V.P.
